For every scholarship there is an application, for every application there are two letters of reccomendation, for those two letters you write one letter to reccomend yourself, to visually prove your point there is a portfolio, and for every portfolio a written list of works.
There is also a deadline. For the New York Studio Program and Scholarship, that deadline came today!
By a complete miracle I was able to get all of the above together in a week, while still trying to complete my school assignments and go to work – but its in!!
I have burnt two different discs, bought two cases, set-up various meetings and reminders for my letters and reccomendation forms, stressed over portfolio options, and re-wrote my statement until it could not be re-written anymore.
Somehow after trying so hard, it seems like a loss. There are so many applications in for this opportunity, and there is only one choice.
Finding the perfect balance between hopeful anticipation and the reality is impossible. Then there is the ‘waiting’ stage when you realize that somewhere between skipping lunch to meet with a professor and re-printing the CD case cover three times that deep inside your brain your mind is determined to be more attatched to an idea than you conciously planned.
For my portfolio I included two photo series that I felt particularily attatched to.
The first is ‘Ten Nights’ a contempoary view on erasing the individuality of man, the process of sleep, and the bodies unconcious movements during sleep. Here are five images from that body of work, all shot digitally.
The second group I included was from a final project from April 2009. This work was a consideration of life’s brevity. Looking at attempts to form a life into something meaningful once it has already reached its finale and run its individual course. These were shot with on 120mm film, scanned and digitally enhanced resulting in a similar effect I achieved in the darkroom by exposing the photo paper twice using specific burning and dodging techniques. This was quite a large body of work, which I cut down to just six images for the porfolio, here are three that were small enough to up-load.